My Beef With Her Beef


Dark here, railing against Holo some more.

I (holo) have to start this by saying that I love Dark, I really do. Hell, I think everyone but Sophie does.

I’ve been here a long time. Of course we co-exist. You and Sophie are new.

She’s got lots of skills. She’s basically the only one with any spacial perception.

So does Muse!

She’s graceful and inspiring. All the boys love her. She’s great with kids(sometimes), and a pretty good teacher. She’s kept me from committing suicide more than once.

Us. Kept us from committing suicide. Don’t forget that we would ALL die.

She’s a great friend, but not such a good headmate.

She prefers to do her own thing, which is cool, but she sometimes keeps her memories from the rest of us.

It’s called privacy. I don’t keep anything important, you just have a need to know every damn thing about everybody!

She ‘killed’ the one who responded to the body name, saying “she was a poorly fused peice of flux”. And while that was probably true, she had no right.

Can’t argue here. But done is done, and the whole system is doing better now.

And she has impulses that scare me. She is pyromanical (not many of us like fire, and I’m almost phobic), which is okay when we need to turn on the stove and cook, but not okay when she wants to burn trees or houses (which we haven’t let her do).

Which I’ve promised NOT to do, but you’re too young to know that.

She also wants to mutilate animals! We also haven’t let her do that. We hand it all over to Sleeper and we conk out on the spot, wherever we find ourselves. (In the middle of PE once, but we were on the bleachers)

See above. And sa called Sleeper front, or GASP I did! Oh the horror!

She’s also OBSESSED with serial killers. While they facinate most of us, she is TOO INTERESTED.

And you’re TOO OBSESSED with keeping a FALSE, UNHEALTHY “peace”. We’re going to argue, get over it! I don’t LIKE harming system members. IT HURTS ME TOO! You didn’t even know about the whole thing until I TOLD YOU. I did what I felt needed to be done. I’m not confident that I made the right choice, but I can’t change that.

But she’s not all bad! She’s a real person.

Duh!

She’s awesome at math, but doesn’t do well with history except for the more morbid fascits… Science excites her, again, in a morbid way. She’s got no real use for English, but loves poetry. She likes to laugh when the rest of us are struggling.

I have a morbid sense of humor. *shrugs* So shoot me and call me a goth.

And she’s about the only one of us that likes to exercise.

Someone has to! Not that I really ever get to…

She very nice, very codial and pleasent until she gets offended. Then she just GOES OFF!

Yeah… I’ve gotten a lot better about that if you can remember. We’ve never been arrested, haven’t been in trouble for nearly four years now. I have a short temper. I work on it. I step back when it’s too much for me.

I don’t let her front, but Mag will.

BS. You’ve CONSCIOUSLY let me front. And you don’t really know how to STOP me, you just know how to keep coming annoyingly forward until I leave. *I* can keep you in the back, I just WON’T. You just want to sound like a martyr.

Dark really looks up to Muse, so I hope Muse can talk to her, and get her to work on some things, because I love her, and I WANT her to be able to front, but I can’t risk it! I don’t want her to injure us or anyone else.

Already said I WON’T.

This also makes me think there is a lot more to Muse than her caring face, but that’s not really what I’m talking about at the moment.

Idiot, SHE’S A MUSE! A Muse on a war ship (or similar). She has a background, but like me, she’s pretty private.

Dark is actually in a relationship, believe it or not, with Apollo, which suprised me a little at first, but now I understand.

Of COURSE it would suprise you… You don’t know anything about me!

He seems to moderate her, but if they were to co-front, people would really be able to tell. I mean, there would be this HUGE change in personality.

As if we didn’t already have HUGE personality shifts? Enough that people SERIOUSLY thought that we had been misdiagnosed!

So I can unleash the pair on the world and throw Sleeper up there to shut everything down, god forbid, or I have to come up with SOMETHING!

I prefer to front alone, thank you. Maybe Muse can come up here, but I really want my space.

And PLEASE don’t think that Dark is just an angry, bad person. She really is great! She has a really keen sense of justice, and can achieve ANYTHING she puts her mind to. But she clings to her violent thoughts like Melencholia clings to her suicidal thoughts, and Illia hangs onto thoughts of cutting and being raped. We all have our crosses to bear, even Sophie. It’s just that Dark’s is the most distressing at the moment.

Chillax Holo, distress is not the end of the world! You’ll survive!

I want to get to see more of Dark, because she’s the one that’s the most frustrated, and is contributing to our depression. Which makes her angry… (insert explaination of viscious cycle)

Dude, I WANT TO EXERCISE! I hate sunlight, and we’re not allowed out after dark. See an issue? And also, Sophie is a prude. I’m sorry, but I’m pretty sexual! Why the hell do you think Apollo and I get on so well?

Ideas anyone? I just don’t know where to start.

Start with a deep breath. Think clearly. THEN TRY TO TALK TO ME INSTEAD OF FREAKING OUT.

Anyway…. that was my two cents.

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